Kids Not Coping with Change? Help Starts Here

By: Laura Bennett

For high-schoolers doing exams or Year 6 students about to graduate primary school, this time of year is a significant transitional season.

The end of term and uncertainties about the school year ahead can make kids feel uneasy and unsure about how to deal with change.

Fiona Macallum is the General Manager of Mackillop Seasons, an organisation providing resilience-development programs to schools, who sees change as an opportunity to help young people learn to process grief and loss.

“Children and young people are really good at adapting, Fiona told said.

“But we do know that change and loss can take many forms [and] a grief reaction can come from any significant change or loss that occurs in our lives.”

Finishing term, leaving school or getting into university may not seem like something to grieve, but it does mark the end of something just as much as it signifies new experiences are on the way.

“We often think about grief being only related to bereavement,” Fiona said.

“[But changing grades or schools] can mean a change potentially in friendship networks, [it’s] a whole new routine.

“With that is going to possibly come some excitement, but possibly also some fear and sadness about the fact that I’m losing my normal.”

For parents or carers trying to support children through change, one of the key things is to normalise the reactions they may be having to it.

“It’s acknowledging that this is a really big transition and that it’s OK to feel a mix of emotions,” Fiona said.

“It’s about meeting them where they’re at: if they have questions answer those questions honestly in an age-appropriate way. Acknowledge that we as adults also experience change, and that sometimes it’s difficult.

“If you see regression in behaviour or you see withdrawal from social networks it’s an opportunity to lean in and just check in with them, and then possibly in some circumstances seek additional help.”

For more information and resources visit MacKillop Seasons.

Article supplied with thanks to Hope Media.

Feature image: Photo by Xavier Mouton Photographie on Unsplash

About the Author: Laura Bennett is a media professional, broadcaster and writer from Sydney, Australia.